Sometimes, I have doubts about this whole God thing. I have been a Christian for over 50 years and I still don't fully trust Him. I still question and second-guess and wonder.

I wonder sometimes if Jesus was really raised from the dead. Did the disciples have an emergency meeting after the crucifixion and come up with this wild story to somehow salvage a public relations disaster? Chuck Colson puts those doubts to rest with this quote, "I know the resurrection is a fact, and Watergate proved it to me. How? Because 12 men testified they had seen Jesus raised from the dead, then they proclaimed that truth for 40 years, never once denying it. Every one was beaten, tortured, stoned and put in prison. They would not have endured that if it weren't true. Watergate embroiled 12 of the most powerful men in the world-and they couldn't keep a lie for three weeks. You're telling me 12 apostles could keep a lie for 40 years? Absolutely impossible." OK. That makes sense. It's a good - no, great argument for believing what's in the Bible.

I don't trust that He really has my back. The Bible says that God is always with us, that His plans are meant to prosper us, not hurt us, and that he always works everything together for good. But I've had some pretty rough times in my life and I haven't necessarily found that things turned out all sunshine and roses. 

The other day, though, I heard Anne Graham Lotz say "His promises are a prophesy." When I heard that, I sort of paraphrased it in my mind by saying "His promises are a predictor of what will happen." But then I realized that they are more than predictions, they are assurances. 

We can trust that He has our backs and that all things work together for good. We may not see it, but, by faith, we know that it's happening.

And, when I'm honest with myself, I admit that I've known when He was helping me. I've seen good things come out of bad situations. So, sometimes we don't even need faith to know that He's in control.

As the song goes, "Sometimes those voices try to tell me I'm forgotten, and I've fallen too far from his hands; But I know what kind of God he is And I'm trusting in His promises. I'm believing and I'm singing Yes he can."

He has and so I know He can. He can and so I know He will. 

 

Let's be real. Most of us gossip about others. But why, when we know we shouldn't? And is it necessarily bad?

The Good and the Bad and the Ugly

We first need to be clear that there is "good" gossip and there is "bad" gossip... and then there's really ugly gossip. These three categories are differentiated by the intent behind sharing the information.

"I heard that Jessica's having a baby!" can be good, bad, or really ugly, depending on the context.

If Jessica's been trying to have a baby for a while and learned that she's finally pregnant, the statement will be delivered as a happy revelation.

If Jessica is an unwed teenager, the statement may be cloaked in judgment and distain.

If Jessica is not, in fact, pregnant, the statement - whether you are just passing along what you heard or you are starting a negative falsehood - can cause unimaginable heartache.

Why We Gossip

One study suggests that over half of our conversations are about "socially relevant topics" which includes talking about people. But is it all bad? Nope.

Entertainment

Sometimes gossip can be fun. Telling a funny story about a mutual friend can be entertaining, as long as it's not malicious. If you're going to engage in this kind of gossip, be sure you understand your motivation so you are using funny stories to ridicule or embarrass.

Informational

My small group at church maintains a prayer list that we update each time we meet. I like going over the list and hearing new information about the people I am praying for. Usually, this is very personal - often medical or financial - information. Relaying this information could easily turn ugly, but, since our motivation is to intercede on their behalf, we would never use that information to hurt those we pray for.

Instructional

A story about my daughter has been circulating for years. Thankfully, it is a story of caution, not one of those ugly rumors. When she was about 12, she absent-mindedly left a candle burning in her bedroom. That might not have been so catastrophic if she had followed my frequent reminders to use candle holders. Instead, she had placed the candle on top of her clock radio which sat on her nightstand. When the flame reached the clock, it quickly caught fire. Thankfully, the fire didn't spread to anything but the nightstand and the house suffered nothing but smoke damage, but it was a tough and expensive lesson about the importance of using a candle holder. The story quickly spread throughout our circle of friends and the adults used it as a safety lesson with their children. Even years later, people will occasionally say "I remember when Maria's room caught on fire. That taught me to always use a candle holder!".

Maliciousness

The ugly gossip usually involves spreading rumors or even factual stories with the intent to tarnish someone's reputation. The co-worker who makes sure everyone knows about the mistake you made or the girl at school who spreads a false rumor just to build up herself. Whatever the reason or method, ugly gossip is, at the least, hurtful but, it can have far-reaching and long-term damaging effects. 

As Exodus 23:1 says, "You must not pass along false rumors. You must not cooperate with evil people by lying on the witness stand."

Keep in mind that ugly gossip says much more about the person spreading it than it does about the subject of the gossip.

How Do I Stop Ugly Gossip?

• Follow Paul's advice to the Ephesians: Let everything you say be good and helpful.

• Think about your motivation for spreading the gossip and address it. Are you jealous? Do you think you have to tear others down to build yourself up? Trying to fit in with other gossipers? I don't have to tell you that those are feelings and actions that need to be addressed in order to maintain a close relationship with Jesus.